Science of Love, Sex, and Babies

The case for why men don’t really prefer porn star bodies

Posted in media by jenapincott on March 22, 2009

In BLONDES I discuss how tall, super-skinny hipless bodies aren’t as desirable to most men as many women think. The average catwalk strutter has a body mass index of 16.5 — skinny enough to be subfertile. Among other reasons why fashion models are long and wispy is that clothes appear more striking on them than on shorter, curvy women. The industry also happens to be dominated by gay men. Fair enough. But what about porn models? Wouldn’t those gals represent the male ideal of the female form?

The answer is not really, according to Eric Holland in the latest issue of Archives of Sexual Behavior. Responding to an earlier study on the measurements of successful porn actresses, Holland, who has become a public voice for the “red-blooded” straight male, made the following points:

1. Porn stars didn’t achieve success in their profession because they have optimal bodies. Holland points out that it’s wrong to assume that just because a woman represents the feminine “ideal” just because she has made it to the top as a porn actress. Her success is attributed to more than looks alone. It may be that those who make it to the top are willing to partake in more extreme acts with more enthusiasm.

2. Women who have many sex partners, or high sociosexuality, tend to have higher testosterone levels. [*] According to Holland, many porn stars have high-testosterone “masculinized” features, e.g. a higher waist-to-hip ratio (more tubular shape), flatter backside, and stronger and more prominent jawline. Men prefer a more feminine body type, says Holland. Breast implants, airbrushing, posing, and fancy filtered lights confuse the eye because they feminize an otherwise high-testosterone look. Holland claims many top porn stars have body types that, if seen pre-op and without light tricks, would strike us as surprisingly masculine. (Focusing on stars, he fails to address the legions of poorly-paid no-name actors with unambiguously feminine body types.)

3. Playboy centerfolds are more masculine because they’re picked by a man thought to be bisexual. Hugh Hefner, the magazine’s editor-in-chief (who has a strong role in the selection process) tends to choose women with more masculine features, especially stronger jawlines. (Hefner, in his bio, has admitted to having had gay sex.) Holland claims that Hefner’s tastes aren’t necessarily those of most straight men. Holland’s photo gallery of popular “masculinized” centerfold models is here.

4. Porn actress measurements are often unreliable anyway. The stats indicate that the median BMI of popular porn stars is 18.3, which is below the threshold of a healthy body weight, whereas some studies have found that men in western societies actually prefer a BMI more like 19.5-20.5 or higher. That said, Holland claims the measurements that accompany a centerfold’s photo might not always be a true reflection of her weight. Sizing up the centerfolds’ bodies, it appears they are heavier than reported. (I describe women’s WHR and BMI in some depth in the book.)

The interesting questions, some unanswerable: Do straight men agree with Holland? To what degree are men’s tastes influenced by porn? Would a guy subtly shift his sensibilities after seeing an erotization of androgenization? Are preferences context-specific — e.g., in porn, are hard tubular bodies and fake oversized breasts hot, whereas in wives they’re not? To what extent does race matter? What does it take to be a porn star, and is there really an implicit selection process that favors more “masculinized women”? Given the range of men’s erotic tastes, which surely involve more than beauty, is Holland’s hypothesis even testable?

Only one thing is clear here: When it comes to women’s bodies, many have much to say, but there’s no clear arbiter of taste. Nor should there be.

* A reader wrote to ask for a study that supports Holland’s assertion that high testosterone in women is associated with having more sex partners. Here’s one (sorry, full-text version for subscribers only).

Straight guys: Do you agree with Holland’s points?

50 Responses

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  1. On the Money said, on March 22, 2009 at 4:37 pm

    So why the pic of the chubbette? (lol)

  2. ReallyEvilCanine said, on March 23, 2009 at 2:27 am

    mistake is to use BMI as any meaningful measure. It’s a flawed system designed by a Belgian more than a century ago who was trying to simply define body sizes. An athlete and an obese person will both peg high; a weightlifter or other bodybuilder even higher.

    1) probably.
    2) unproven hypothesis
    3) unsupported conjecture; what bi-males want from women is not what they want from men & vice-versa
    4) BMI is meaningless

  3. stinginthetail said, on March 23, 2009 at 6:08 am

    To me they just look hard-faced, like many women in the porn industry – funny how that happens. Some of them it’s surgery, or makeup, but it seems to be a look they get.

    I find it hard to believe this theory, or even take it seriously – i know plenty of bi men who are comfortable with their sexuality, and into feminine women and masculine men.

  4. Ducker said, on March 23, 2009 at 11:23 am

    Ok…my personal opinion:
    Regular catwalk models are horrible, then again myself and most men will find underwear models real cute due the fact that these models are more curvy look healthier and with more meat on the bones (i.e. victoria´s secret angels and such).

    Now on the case of porn stars the only influence I can say it has is that it gives you ideas to try with your partner to spice things up a bit. I have never heard of friends how´d say “id like me a porn star body” what ive mostly heard is “id like a girl how´d MOVE in bed like a porn star”.
    Besides most men like natural bodies (which porn stars have a tendency for plastic) and men think porn stars have bad and skanky reputations so dont forget that popular phrase “a lady on the street and a freak in the bed”.

    As always, interesting and illustrative article, keep the good stuff coming!

  5. Prithvi said, on March 23, 2009 at 1:15 pm

    It was not the woman that used to hold a man’s fascination. It was the mystery in her. The porn stars and catwalk twiggies are very similar, being just animated puppets, doing precisely what they are supposed to do. Most of today’s women are flint hard stereotypes and as for today’s men, they have no patience for mysteries. Is the fine art of a long pursuit dead? Mmmmm… the woman who drove me home last night…. What was her name? lolol…

  6. cocofst said, on March 23, 2009 at 3:33 pm

    I do not have much to say here, except that I am confused about the attractiveness implants. From what I have seen…it is very rare to see implants that look natural. Maybe someone can explain this one to me.

    • Lily said, on June 15, 2009 at 10:01 am

      I find some implants very attractive. In fact, some implants look better than some natural breasts. Yet, I would choose a perfect pair of natural breasts before implants anyday. It’s extremely important to find a reputable cosmetic surgeon if one wishes to undergo such a procedure.

      My friend has breast implants which are too large for her frame. She figures that all men prefer very large breasts so she opted for that and is thinking of getting larger ones. I did not have the heart to tell her that her plastic surgeon did not do a good job as the scars are visible, about an inch below her nipples as opposed to the crease of the breast and her nipples are positioned unaturally high. Also, I do not like the hard feel of breast implants.

  7. lollygabber said, on March 23, 2009 at 4:22 pm

    The fact that most pornographic images are VERY airbrushed makes the women less appealing because they deviate so far from reality. Most men are very visual, and the more realistic the image, the more turned on they become.

    • Lily said, on June 15, 2009 at 10:09 am

      I agree with you when you say that pornographic images deviate far from reality.
      I’ve known plenty of men who can’t stand seeing pubic hair on a woman. Apparently, it’s not supposed to grow down there!

      I will have to disagree with you on men being turned on by realistic images because realistic is that 90% of women have stretch marks, the majority of women have cellulite, less-than-perfect breasts, and pubic hair. lol

      The majority of men whom I have met would take a porn star, runway or underwear model before an everyday woman.

  8. EnemyAirships said, on March 23, 2009 at 5:11 pm

    Porn actresses are almost entirely unattractive because they represent completely false and distorted body images. Blonde hair, botox, make up, collagen injections, breast implants, fake tans… even one or two of these attributes can make someone entire unappealing in my eyes.

    Hair colour isn’t really important, but a symmetrical face (distorted by collagen and botox), cleanliness (disguised by make up/fake tan), parabolic natural breasts (obliterated by implants), wide hips and a healthy weight are all aspects that I regard as ‘innate’ measurements of attractiveness. It seems almost as if porn stars go out of their way to eradicate any natural attraction you might accidentally acquire when watching them in action by making themselves as inhuman as possible.

    Then, there is also the non-physical factor. When you see some of the things a porn star will do to alter their image then you have to seriously question how you could ever be attracted to them in the first place.

    • Lily said, on June 15, 2009 at 10:14 am

      I don’t think cleanliness is disguised by makeup and and fake tans. They disguise skin imperfections like cellulite, scars, birthmarks, and stretch marks. Face it, no one wants to watch porn where women are all scabbed and scarred.
      As much as many men like to talk about how natural they like their women, most of them do not find saggy breasts, stretch marks and cellulite attractive physcial traits on a woman. None of these conditions have anything to do with lack of hygene or cleanliness.

  9. scottsommers said, on March 23, 2009 at 10:10 pm

    Porn is a highly commercialized product. As much as it is true that porn stars have appeal, their appeal is aimed at men willing to pay for this appearance. Given the widespread availability of free pornography, men willing to pay for this are almost certainly distinct from men who are not. The working conditions in the porn industry are not ideal. In addition to the social stigma associated with this kind of work, disease and drug use is rampant. Women involved in porn are probably involved for reasons that would make it less likely to find healthy, attractive women.

  10. Joe Bible said, on March 24, 2009 at 12:38 am

    Just stumbled upon this, not going to add my two cents, but very interesting post.

  11. swingantho said, on March 24, 2009 at 8:08 am

    My friend has fake boobs, botox and she’s too skinny. She wonders why men look at me more than her.

    • Lily said, on June 15, 2009 at 9:40 am

      I know what you mean. Both my friend and I are skinny, except that my friend is unfortunately skinny due to an eating disorder. She used to be bulimic at one point in her life and now she’s the opposite. She doesn’t completely starve herself, but she doesn’t eat adequately.
      She was under the impression that once she dyed her hair blonde, lost a lot of weight, got breast implants and got a tan that men would look at her and not me. I really could care less who gets stared at the most. (It’s not that I do not believe in healthy competition but I really don’t care to compete over who gets the most attention.)I just wish she had a healthier body image and attitude. Doesn’t help that her mom would always tell her that she was fat and disgusting when she used to be curvier. Her sister has been bulimic for a few years now.

  12. Top Posts « said, on March 24, 2009 at 7:32 pm

    […] The case for why men don’t really prefer porn star bodies In BLONDES I discuss how tall, super-skinny hipless bodies aren’t as desirable to most men as many women think. […] […]

  13. Nubi said, on April 8, 2009 at 2:58 am

    I’m sorry, but I can’t take Eric Holland seriously. He’s a deranged pseudo scientist at best.

  14. Utirwerty said, on April 10, 2009 at 4:37 am


  15. tom said, on April 21, 2009 at 3:27 am

    “Her success is attributed to more than looks alone. It may be that those who make it to the top are willing to partake in more extreme acts with more enthusiasm.”

    dont buy it at all. there are just too many actresses these days for that to be true. the variety of women, different fetishes and preferences for body types is all catered to in this massive and diverse market, even milf/gilf porn exists. and men DO choose based on looks, if extreme behavior was the only measure then every girl would be max hardcore standard, and that is clearly not the case. as said by a previous poster, sounds like pseudo science at best. you cannot make broad generalizations about anything from porn except that men like looking at sex/naked women. sure you can spew old dogma about body images,unrealistic this or that…but the reality does not back up the old feminist dogma. from amateur to just plain fat or ugly, it exists now in porn if you want it, u got it. buxom, and even flat as a board. your choice. in any case the fear for other womens self worth is a bit patronizing. if women are being tricked into thinking that flat as a board run way models are male ideals, then the same claim is made about buxom porn actresses, somethings wrong with the dogma.

  16. bob said, on April 21, 2009 at 9:26 am

    I wish I could write this well! great blog thanks.

  17. Scott Sommers said, on May 5, 2009 at 5:37 am


    You’re correct that there’s a lot of nonsense written about porn by people with very little personal knowledge. In fact, it’s one of those strange areas where most of what’s said about it in public is not just said by unknowledgeable people, but people who believe their lack of personal experience makes their position even stronger.

    Nevertheless, you seem to have missed the point. Of course looks matter. All things being equal, the best looking bondage models will have an advantage. But that is not the point. The comparison is not between one bondage model and another but between sex/fashion industry women and women who do not work in the sex/fashion industry. What needs to be explained is why industry women do not look like the non-industry women that men repeatedly and reliably see as attractive.

    The explanation seems pretty straightforward. Porn is a dangerous, degrading and stigmatizing place for a woman to work. Women end up in porn because they have a troubled life. We’re not selecting from the top of the pyramid here.

  18. Lily said, on June 15, 2009 at 9:43 am

    I thought that porn stars were required to have that look in order to be more successful. I know plenty of men who love the tan, breast implant, platinum blonde look. I’ve even had one man say that his future wife will look that way one day.

  19. Scott Sommers said, on June 15, 2009 at 10:14 pm

    There are 2 problems here. One of them is the judged physical beauty of porn stars. But that’s a really simple problem and the answer is clear. These are generally not good looking women and if you didn’t know they were porn stars, I doubt you’d look at them and think they were beautiful. The second problem is more complex. Men ‘choose’ women (like other consumer products) for all kinds of reasons other than just judgments of physical beauty. what’s going through your friend’s head when he says this, I can hardly imagine, but I doubt it’s got a lot to do with their physical beauty.

    I don’t doubt your friend and many other men desire women that look like porn stars. After all, that’s the look of profession sex film industry workers. They are marketed as the hottest, most desirable sex partners. It’s perfectly understandable that some men want this. But the reality is that that’s what porn workers look like and everyone knows it. It’s a manufactured look, a product if you will, that the porn industry has created from the raw material they have to work with. And that raw is generally speaking not selected from the cream of the crop.

  20. Tom said, on September 4, 2009 at 4:59 pm

    We all know we live in a sex-soaked society. So why do we continually stick their heads in the sands and pretend that pornography isn’t a huge problem in the destruction of relationships?

    When polled anonymously, over 50% of pastors admit to struggling with pornography. We’re not talking about priests who have taken a vow of celibacy these are married men. If pastors are struggling in such great numbers, how much more of a problem is it with regular guys? Is there any hope of restoring the natural romantic pursuit of a real woman?

    There is a book that just released this month that deals with pornography and men in a very frank and direct manner. The title is ‘Real Sex Doesn’t Come from a Website: The Rewards of Pursuing Your Wife’ by author Andrew K. Fox.

    You can read read the first chapter in the book free, just go to

  21. Scott Sommers said, on September 7, 2009 at 11:47 am

    Tom, I am not one to defend pornography, but who cares what 50% of pastors have to say? Really, who cares? This probably says more about the kind of person who becomes a pastor than it does about pornography.

    The biggest issue with pornography is that really, no one knows much about it. Almost everything written on it is written from a moral point of view by feminist and Christian activists or is fan material written to provide information and titilation to viewers. Nothing meaningful is known about distribution, how marketing decisions are made, or about the lives of people involved. Sure, everyone knows all the myths created by the interest groups that produce all the writing about it, but it’s very hard to get the kind of information a government would need to make real policy.

    And this crap about the sexual problems of Christian leaders sure doesn’t help.

    • Tom said, on September 16, 2009 at 12:19 pm

      The only reason there is a reference to pastors is from the standpoint of what they would have to lose should their addiction become public, namely everything. I would think that this fear would give them a greater need to keeps thing normal. Average guys have no such pressure in their lives so how many more are into and or struggling to get out of a porn addiction.
      The book I mentioned doesn’t “preach” about the “evils” of porn but challenges guys to make the real woman you live with everyday the object of your passion not some fantasy you see in a video or picture.
      My guess is that most men are too lazy or scared to do this though. It’s a whole lot easier to view some porn and masturbate than it is to work at pursuing your wife and risking the chance of rejection. Alot of the porn industry’s business would dry up if we as men would just man up!

  22. Herdcore Porn said, on September 8, 2009 at 5:27 pm

    Great dude!Now I know what the things that I should observe inorder to identify if a women have big experience about sex.

  23. Lil'Devil said, on September 15, 2009 at 8:39 pm

    I hate the porn industry period. It gives men (and women) the wrong idea of how one should act in bed. I can not tell you how many times I hear couples complain about how dissappointing it was to find out that one of them couldn’t perform an act the other saw in a porn clip or picture. The men complain that the woman isn’t wild enough or raunchy enough, and the women complain that the man isn’t as zealous or romantic enough. It is sad to hear this that couple EXPECT their mate to act or do certain things in bed. It defeats the purpose of sex. Not to mention some go to far as to “make” or ‘take” another forcefully thinking this is how sex is. It is very heartbreaking.

  24. Scott Sommers said, on September 17, 2009 at 12:26 am

    TOm, I’m a little confused by your comment. In your initial post, you describe pastors as, “struggling with pornography”. In your moire recent remark it’s transfomed into “an addiction”. There are lots of things I struggle with, but am I addicted to them? Hardly.

    You’re tying really hard to make your comments seem like they’re not connected to religious beliefs. It may be that pornography has effects on people that damage their lives and society. I can’t really say, since there’s not very much meaningful information known. One thing I can say is that there are Christians involved in the anti-porn movement who are committed to the idea that it takes a hold of people’s lives and destroys them. Would it surprise me that church pastors also believe this and hope that they share this struggle even though they are spiritual leaders? Not at all.

    We have now have a lot of opinions about porn. Frankly, I’d like to know what it’s really about.

  25. john smith said, on October 10, 2009 at 5:50 am

    I look at porn and i can see that the taste of the white male population has been manipulated to “prefer” the skinny blonde. If you look at the older porn circa1940-1950 you will see many more dark haired women with realistic bodies
    i think this is because of the gay influence in all the visual media, hollywood, print etc.
    this has even leaked over to Black porn,even though the black women tend to reflect the taste of black men i.e. bigger women

  26. LrsDude said, on October 22, 2009 at 6:26 am

    Someone should conduct a study to determine whether men who view pornography stray from their wives more due to an acquired dissatisfaction, or less because the pornography becomes an outlet for that very compulsion.

    As for this article, it should really refer to the “celebrity pornstar” or “porn starlett” or something, because if we want to talk about pornography in general, we have to acknowledge that all ages, hair colors, ethnicities, and body types are represented in pornography today, as is easily verified by a quick google search.

    • Scott Sommers said, on November 1, 2009 at 11:56 pm

      The point of talk about “differnt kinds of porn” seems to be that this diversity reflects market demand for different ages, hair colors, ethnicities, and body types. The implication of this is that the porn industry gets to choose who it uses as models instead of using what it has in a way that can make it money. The same is true for “celebrity pornstar” or “porn starlett”. The industry works with who it has to work with. There’s a reason why porn is full of beaten up drug addicts and not fitness instructors.

      • john smith said, on August 19, 2010 at 4:55 am

        i bet you have never dated anyone who looks half as hot as most of the porn actresses

    • Krissy said, on January 18, 2010 at 7:16 am

      It would be impossible to conduct such a study as you would need to compare men who watch porn to those that don’t, and I think the former outweighs the later.

  27. EJ Kendig said, on December 16, 2009 at 8:41 pm

    My fiance has been struggling with a porn addiction since he was 12 years old. Not only does our society encourage it (don’t say they don’t because they do!) his family members knowingly and unknowingly encouraged him in it.

    He came from a broken home where both his divorced parents were extremely selfish about their needs and not concerned for his emotional welfare. He was a quiet child who kept his hurts to himself because he knew no one wanted to hear them.

    Enter the secret and sinful delight of porn.

    He watched porn everyday, masturbated EVERYDAY (sometimes 4 or 5 times a day), and even shunned going out with friends to stay home and watch porn.

    He wouldn’t stop at “normal” porn either. He escalated his porn tastes to even more and more terrible extremes like young girls being raped, groups of women being urinated and defecated on, women being choked, and other cases of women being tortured/objectified.

    When we first got together I told him up front that I can’t stand porn and that it makes me feel very self-conscious about my body and my sense of self.

    (I’m not ugly or obese or anything like that; I have an athletic build and a modest B cup, but my once young and supple body is not as nice as some of those girls who haven’t had children or worked hard labor like I have. In fact, people always comment on how lucky he is or insultingly ask, “Why are you with him?!”)

    He was fine with that. He genuinely threw all his porn out.

    But about 3 months into our relationship, he had started sneaking porn. I discovered it, of course. I literally wanted to die. The thought of him watching other naked women having sex (and worse), getting aroused, and then masturbating to it revolts me so bad I could vomit. To me, it’s cheating.

    And don’t say it’s because I didn’t take care of him! We typically had sex almost everyday with me being very open-minded about trying new things, etc. I always enjoyed it and he acted like he did. I was his first.

    This addiction has TRULY shaped the way he thinks about sex. I don’t think I can ever live up to the fantasies in his head. I know my body will never be what he truly lusts after. It kills me a little everytime to realize this over again.

    This episode of him sneaking it, me finding out, and then the resulting blow up has happened 7 times in two years. I struggle everytime to make the decision to just leave and can’t. Not only do we have a beautiful daughter together (whom I breastfed which ruined my breasts more from their natural perkiness), we’ve been planning our wedding and future together for over two years. I feel like I’d be throwing a good thing away that might eventually smooth itself out.

    He says he wants to change. He says he loves me and loves my body. He says he hates porn and doesn’t want to look at it anymore. He says he hates himself for giving into it. Should I believe any of this? He’s lied so many times.

    This last time it happened (a week before our anniversary) I made him leave for the night and go to his mom and grandma and talk to them about it. I made him tell them everything. Should’ve been humiliating, right? Lucky thing I wasn’t there. They told him he should respect my wishes, but there wasn’t anything wrong with him. This is akin to him coming to them about a drug addiction and them supplying him more of the drug. His brother even said, “You pay the bills, you can do what you want.”

    I’m at my wit’s end with this. I can’t even have sex with him now. I tried once after this last incident and started crying uncontrollably over my worthlessness. Talk about a buzzkill. He’s even having wet dreams at night now without having me or porn to satisfy himself. I don’t know what to do.

    So, men, why can’t you satisfy your sexual desires with your actual women? If you don’t have a woman you think I should understand your porn watching? No, I don’t. The more you allow yourself to believe it’s okay, the more you’re going to ALWAYS think it’s okay, even if your partner doesn’t.

    Porn is the absolute worse homewrecker.

    • Amy said, on July 12, 2011 at 4:50 am

      Your a silly women marrying somoen who watched young girls getting raped, not all men who watch porn do that, not even all porn addictas stoop that low. Being addicted to something doesnt excuse horrible acts that involve hurting others. Do you ever think about how those girls feel? THEY are the real victims not YOU some sily womne who actually thought she could compare and a silly man who cant control his impulses. There is no excuse for raping or getting off on watching girls get raped. And child porn is illegal. Its not an addiction. Its a CRIMINAL OFFENCE. SHAME ON YOU FOR BEING WITH A GUY WHO WOULD DO THAT. CHILD PORN IS ILLEGAL. ITS A CRIME NOT AN ADDICTION.

      Thats sick and disgusting. There is a difference between watching porn, porn addiction and condoning violence againstwomen and girls. Boohoo he comes from a broken family, alot of people do. No excuse for being that disgusting. Your an idiot marrying someone like him. Guys like him need to harden up. Stop making out like he is a victim etc, hes not, he makes his own choices like everyone else, I am so tired of everyone making excuses for porn addicts, druggies etc. These people are selfish and get addicted to stuff the rest of us moderate. Oh and not all men are like that.I know plenty men who love sex with realwomen, maybe if bimbos like you stoped always teaching these men they can be total jerks and still have realtiosnhips they would try a bit harder to give up. Why the heck would you get involved with someone like that?


  28. Ajit Parkash said, on January 2, 2010 at 2:45 am

    I agree and disagree with Holland. I personally like all natural and healthy women whether in porn or real life. However, I have noticed after being a regular frequenter of porn forums that more than 90% of men prefer implants on real breasts. They even support naturally busty actresses getting the implants “just to improve” the shape of the breasts.

  29. tringuladating said, on January 6, 2010 at 1:00 am

    Yes, porn start body are liked by most of the sex addicted persons. And such persons look for different partners to satisfy their sex appetite and for this they searches such partners there on dating sites so they often use free online dating services sites.

  30. Steven Bustos said, on January 16, 2010 at 1:52 pm

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  31. Krissy said, on January 18, 2010 at 7:27 am

    As a female that watches porn and enjoys it, not regularly but mostly when the mood strikes (it’s funny how I feel the need to justify looking at porn and mention that, but that’s the society we live in). I think people take the whole porn is bad too far. Yes it is unrealistic, yes it uses mainly certain “types” of women, yes some men have trouble moderating their use, but the damage it causes has not been measured in a reliable way.

    How much do the women who say it “destroys body image” think about their bodies? Too much I think, cause when I watch it on my own I never feel bad about my sexual performance or body. I’m thinking about how hot the sex looks and how I wouldn’t mind having some myself!

    I agree with a comment made earlier, look past all the make up and plastic! These women AREN’T that great! Stop putting them on a pedestal! They just don’t have shame in spreading their legs for cash. They are people trying to make a living like everyone else. Hey! At least they aren’t living off social security!

    Every women has their pet hates about their body, you wouldn’t be normal if you didn’t, but give it a rest and takes some responsibility for how you feel about yourself. Stop blaming magazines, porn, models and all that other crap. If I feel bad about myself it’s because I allow myself to feel that way. No one can make you do anything.

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  33. Mogudan said, on February 16, 2010 at 4:18 pm

    @EJ Kendig Sorry to hear of your troubles. I have a few questions/comments however. First, your fiance’s porn habits seem to be affecting your sex life, but you didn’t mention anything about HIM not wanting to have sex with YOU. From what I can tell, you aren’t having sex anymore because YOU are disgusted by the porn and stopped having sex with HIM, instead. You are afraid that he won’t find you desirable or you won’t live up to his fantasies, but does he ever really demonstrate that by choosing porn over you? You said “I don’t think I can ever live up to the fantasies in his head. I know my body will never be what he truly lusts after,” and your referred to your breasts as “ruined.” That is what YOU think. It sounds like you may have some self-esteem issues that may be at the core of your insecurity with porn.

    I think that there is a myth that people are supposed to only be attracted to their spouses, but that idea is just unrealistic. You can’t just flip the switch like that. We are human, we are sexual beings, and we all appreciate beauty. As couples, we grow old together, we have rough times, and we end up not looking as supple and young as we once did. The important thing is that despite our fading beauty, we love each other with all our hearts, we built lives together, and we have our memories and support. Those things matter more than fleeting beauty. Have you honestly never admired another man’s looks or maybe thought your fiance could be physically more attractive in some way? We all do that. It doesn’t mean that you or your fiance’s going to run off with the next hot young thing that crosses your path. If he leaves it’s because he never loved you in the first place, not because porn led him astray.

    I can understand how the masturbation can be a problem. The idea of him pleasuring himself without you can be troubling, but here’s a thought. How about watching it with him? This way he is still ultimately getting pleasure from you as either you will masturbate him, or more likely, he will star having sex with you. The thing about porn is that often just watching the act of sex is the catalyst. It’s not that you wish you were having sex with the actors, it’s just that watching them do it turns you on. You might start to enjoy it and I guarantee that it will turn him on and lead to passionate sex. At worst, he might realize that he doesn’t want you watching it either and will understand your point of view. Don’t let this ruin your relationship! Good Luck!

  34. PstarHunter said, on June 9, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    I would have to disagree with this one. My wife is a pornstar (Sandra Syn) and I love the tight petite body on her. I know many men prefer to have a woman with good curves as it is a sign to subconscious of fertility, but I prefer the smaller women. Thats just my opinion….

  35. JB said, on July 1, 2010 at 7:39 pm

    There plenty of porn stars who aren’t ‘thin’…alot of of them are infact plenty curvier and fleshier than fashion models (not talking about the breast implants most of them have on their chests…that aspect of it is messed up)…some popular porn stars are even close to average size, just that they’re firmer/fitter looking even at a size 8 or 10…must be due to their young age or air brushing/photo-shopping, or both…as for the skinny porn actresses…most of the skinny ones are in their late teens and not completely done developing, some naturally get a little heavier and fill out more when they get into their twenties, some stay petite and skinny. The stereotypical porn star look of overly tanned bodies,hot pink lipstick, platinum blonde locks and oversized Z-cup implants popping off their bony bods is so over…or atleast it should be…men are more turned on by the naturally attractive looking porn actresses who have proportionate and healthy-looking feminine bodies without bones jutting out everywhere or loose flab hanging around anywhere. Some men prefer thinner women while others prefer curvy…some also prefer plus-sized women…it’s not about her size really, rather it’s more about having a firm and well-cared for body, and smooth, even skin….and only lastly, her proportions (WHR)…proportions don’t seem to matter as much as having a firm and supple body…better a girl who’s tube shaped but firm and supple, than a woman with a fantastic WHR but all loose and flabby with poor skin tone.

  36. Beth Mahoney said, on July 18, 2010 at 3:00 pm

    Uhhhh, actually men do prefer porn star bodies. I know 4 girls in the industry and when we go out men seem to like them..

  37. Ivy said, on August 1, 2010 at 1:47 pm

    Cindy hope, Sophie Moone, Stephanie Kane, Nessa Devil , Vega Vixon, Georgia Jones ….NONE of these women have masculine features & are all very curvy & well known names in the industry . This article is bullshit…most pornstars do not look masculine. And most playmates are very feminine & beautiful . Men prefer pornstars because not only will they do in bed what most women won’t but many of them   are also more attractive then the average women  . Which is why us normal girls boyfriends  think of porn stats  when they get off or when they have sex with us…we will never be good enough …not unless we get fake breast , have prefect bodies & sallow cum…oh wait then we will be called sluts! We can’t win!

  38. mike said, on August 23, 2010 at 3:30 am

    The reason males crave porn is not that they find their partners less than ideal physically. (How many men with attractive girlfriends/wives cheat all the time? ..Tiger Woods anyone?) The reason is simply that men have a biological desire for multiple partners and sexual variation. This is opposed to women, who generally lean more towards monogamy with a strong provider. These natural instincts are ancient and were once vital in promoting survival and reproduction of our race.

    However in modern society, these instincts are no longer necessary. Women don’t need men to survive and men don’t need to spread their seed like a rabbit in heat to beat the deathrate. That being said, monogamy still remains the most stable and ideal unit for marriage and family and is the accepted norm. Real men simply need to “man up” and be loyal, loving, and accepting of their girlfriends/wives, avoiding porn and the temptations of other lovers altogether.

  39. Palladin9479 said, on September 30, 2010 at 1:02 pm

    Comments are more interesting then the article itself. Lots of hateraid being passed around, mostly by ignorant people. Porn actress’s are actress’s first and foremost. That ability to “act” like their in opulent bliss and enjoying having sex is what determines the top porn star, body types and looks just determine the genre / field they succeed in.

    Here is the thing on porn, its part of the entertainment industry and requires the same things. Professional porn requires a light crew, sound crew, professional cameramen, a director and a script writer. What is a 15 min quick-jerk flick took hours in a hot studio to film / produce. There are starts, stops and do-overs. The set is hot, studio grade lighting is freakishly hot and uncomfortable if you’ve been under them for awhile. The people are very tired and frustrated, especially if one of the actors doesn’t work well with another. Its all scripted from start to the “money shot”. Where the girl / guys stands, the positions, the camera angles, even the looks on the girls faces. And she ~must~ look like she’s enjoying it, even though she’s hot and tired and just wants to rest. She’s gotta appear to be a super horny nympho on some dude all while being critically watched by dozens of people, one of which would yell “cut!” if she screwed up a position or looks awkward. And not to mention their on an extremely tight time schedule, those professional cameramen / lighting experts cost money by the hour and keeping them around any longer then needed just leads to less profits for the producers. Stressful doesn’t even come close to describing it. But its an industry where a girl who can act the appropriate role can make lots and lots of money. Many porn stars have said in multiple interviews that the money is the #1 reason they do it. And FYI, almost all male porn actors have to start in gay porn before they can do straight porn, so just think about that for a minute.

    For the body type preference, that is extremely situational to the guy. What everyone needs to understand is that the “west” aka USA and western Europe are not the standard for appearances. The USA leads the world with a 30% obesity rate. Obesity is defined as someone’s who fat content is such that it is causing health problems. Which means the percentage of “overweight” but otherwise healthy people is even higher then that. Contrast to that to the east Asian nations of South Korea and Japan, at 3.4% and 4.2% obesity rate. Its no that western men “prefer” a bigger chick, is that they simply don’t have many other options. Given half a chance those guys would flock to a more petite body, most likely not all but a significant percentage of them would. We see this all the time here in South Korea amongst the western males who come over to teach English (easy way to make good money).

    As a male, when choosing a partner for a relationship, body appearance is much lower on the list then things like personality and interests. Women here is a clue, those super attractive / feminine girls with skinny bodies and big boobs, the ones you like to talk nasty about when your with your other girl friends. They (super skinny chick) mostly have sh!tty attitudes and are super high maintenance. The guys gotta do entirely too much work to get *permission* to use her *p8ssy*. And while that might be fun every now and then, NO MAN wants to deal with someone like that on a day to day basis. Better to get a less attractive girl who has a better personality and treats the male better then to deal with a princess.

  40. Sashira said, on June 9, 2011 at 8:48 pm

    I’m in the adult industry as a photo model. My stats right now are 5’2″, 135 lbs., 40(37C)-28-38. I get a lot of compliments from photographers and guys on the street, and am praised as “interesting” and “natural”. I’m also pretty freaky, so at one time I sent a photo to some porn producers in L.A. to see what they thought. Their reply was that I didn’t have the look necessary for porn, and to try again after I’d lost 25 pounds, whitened my teeth, and dyed my hair a brighter red.

    So it’s not that the industry couldn’t choose the kind of curvy woman that you see in lingerie ads and erotic photos. It’s that they know what’s worked for them before, to make them millions of dollars, and they don’t want to change something that works. Non-“mainstream” porn is rarer and often distributed on the internet. The big dogs in L.A. are still sticking with the traditional, impossibly skinny, huge-breasted look, a look that is supplied by surgery.

    Oh, and to the guy above me – grow a pair. Just because you’ve been rejected by thin, “super attractive” women doesn’t mean they’re bitches. To pretend that no one wants to be with those “super attractive” women is ridiculous, when you yourself think they’re sexy. I knew a girl in college who was beautiful, slender, a natural D cup. She worked in a strip club long enough to earn the money for college. She wasn’t a bitch, didn’t do drugs, and didn’t go home with the men at the club. She was very meek and was the one BEING abused in all of her relationships. These aren’t the witch trial days; a woman being sexy is no reason to condemn her.

  41. Guest said, on June 15, 2011 at 2:40 pm

    I disagree with him on every thing and looking at his site it’s only Caucasian women so he pretty much loses all creditbility

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